Stress

I’m sitting on the edge of my seat. I can’t relax. I’m super stressed out now. I don't usually blog about my work, but sitting here doing nothing makes me feel even worse.

I just clinched a major deal and should be really happy, but I’m not. Nothing really went smoothly since day 1. The client kept raising her voice at me, and I got to appease her with a nice log cake. The boss kept pressuring me to get all the important stuff to be done before I can proceed with anything else. I’m stuck in between, and could barely breathe.

My colleagues tried to joke with me as usual, but couldn’t get the normal reaction out of me. I just stared at them blankly and walk away. And I just told one of them to stop joking with me, I can’t laugh at all. I’ve never, ever felt this kind of stress and it leaves me wondering, is it worth it? I was told it’s the biggest job in my company’s history. That didn’t make me smile either. I just hope that the payment comes in on time, at least when I see my commission cheque on the 15th, I will know that it’s worth it and I can pat myself on my back. Well, maybe I’ll just pray first, that the job will be delivered on time.

I’m usually calm when it comes to work. Even if problems cropped up, it won’t faze me at all. I mean, even if you start ranting at anyone and everyone, it will not make things right. But this time, I specifically told the production people NO MISTAKES ALLOWED. Yes, in capital, bold and underlined. It’s this serious. Very serious. One mistake and everything will go in disarray.

Nothing bad must happen. That’s why I’m so stressed.

It’s 6.31pm now. I’m supposed to meet up the client at Orchard later, after the proof is ready. Today will be a long day. Just hope I will be able to see Tara before she sleeps tonight.